i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I touched a dick in church today
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
