6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
