This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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