oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
