you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
