I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
