so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
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so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
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Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.