and next time when you feel me up, do it right
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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