Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize