I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize