you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize