Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize