God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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