just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I am midnight drunk by noon
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
