I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
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i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
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I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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