i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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