I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
