idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
