Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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