yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
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