...so i touched it.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
