Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry elsey hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(206): View more from Washington

i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man

Fav 15 1671 1131
share tweet
(678): View more from Georgia

Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.

Fav 14 3486 965
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(716): View more from New York

I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook

Fav 8 3817 992
share tweet
(940): View more from Texas

never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down

Fav 48 5528 1341
share tweet
(916): View more from California

They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.

Fav 23 6571 1199
share tweet
(319): View more from Iowa

he asked me to smell his eyeballs.

Fav 20 1301 5382
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(913): View more from Kansas

Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?

(1-913): View more from Kansas

I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.

Fav 8 1637 809
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(252): View more from North Carolina

Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night

Fav 0 235 166
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(949): View more from California

Must lick fork, like it's a DICK

Fav 0 40 19
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT