I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
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Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
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btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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