How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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