she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
he had hair everywhere except his balls
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
