community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
