so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
this beer tastes like vomit already
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
