Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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