I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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