He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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