Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Less talking, more tequila
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
