we made out on top of his cat.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
