break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
