when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
