remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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