if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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