really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize