everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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