Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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