she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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