me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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