I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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