FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize