My balls are so social today.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize