i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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