I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
