i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
