im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
