Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
accomplished twins. life is a go
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
