when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
